It was a dark night for Mitcham, partly due to the sun having set earlier in the piece, but also partly due to the end result. Upper Gully’s score line resembled the demographic at Daisy’s on a Saturday night; over 28. Our scoreline was more accurate to the crowd at the Irish on a Monday night; under 18. The final score being 36 to 14.

On arrival it appeared the night would go swimmingly, with the canteen having the best lolly selection this side of the Murray, and the nicest canteen lady also this side of the Murray. Unfortunately Upper Gully has other plans, scoring the first 7 goals in quick time and looking as sharp as the LED signage around the new Perth Stadium. We steadied late in the term through some good transitional play by Whiskas Rennick, working in tandem with GA New Girl #1, AKA Jess, AKA the Doc, due to her shooting being as accurate as Doc Brown’s calculations for time travel in the Back to the Future trilogy. We went into 1/4 time 11-4 down, and in need of a rev up from coach Jacko. Unfortunately for us he was harder to find than a non-doping cyclist in the 1990’s, and therefore unable to stir up some motivational soup.

The second term started much like the first, as we found goals harder to come by than Jacko out of bed after 9 o’clock on a footy night. One player who could be found though was Maddie Foster, who like a good hot chocolate being produced was bringing up the heat. We came into half time with a 19-8 deficit, and needed a big turnaround in the second half to be in with any chance.

Our intensity was more intense in the third, as we seeked to claw our way back into the game. Em battled manfully up forward, however has still not managed to find a nickname, and will be looking to add some quirks to her game in the search for one. Harold was more than solid after an ankle injury forced her out of the game last week, in a comeback that hasn’t been seen since Jesus came back from the dead back in the year 0*. Our defensive stalwart Lauren Long Arms was negating the Upper Gully forward line, and Eliza, filling in for the first time, was showing why she is the superior Mckeown, working hard up and done the court, and also proving to be a better person to be around than her brothers.

Unfortunately we couldn’t keep the intensity up for the last quarter, as Upper Gully ran away with it like a stolen pack of Mentos from the servo. President Maka continued her good game, slotting a few cheeky goals against the tide, and Chelsea filling in did all she could to fly the flag for the club, and like Oliver Twist with his dinner at the orphanage, the Mitcham fans will certainly be hoping to get more of her.

Let’s hope we can keep on improving next week when we face another tough game and get a good crowd down with the footy boys having the bye on Saturday. Go Tiges!


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