The Calgary Kangaroos Australian Football Club held their second annual five kilometer pre-season run at Eau Claire on May 2, 2010. Our top fitness performers from the club came out to compete against each other in what turned out to be an action-packed race.
New comer Daniel ran a sizzling final kilometer and finished the 5km run in an impressive 20:25. Congratulations to Daniel who takes the trophy and bragging rights from 2009 winner Bruce Almighty. High altitude training assisted the ex-Panorama lifty, who stated that “getting high is just part of life in BC”.
The well represented Calgary Bears had the top four place getters of the race with Daniel, Gareth “One-gear” Williams (20:50), and Matthew “Ironman” Bell (21:02) making up the top three. Almighty finished fourth and immediately blamed lack of stretching for his uninspiring performance.
Eric Bana look-a-like Dane Rolfe was the fastest man for the Calgary Cowboys, finishing with a time of 22:05. Rolfe was backed as favorite with the punters to win the steak dinner put on offer from Williams. Race officials are looking further into Rolfe’s performance speculating that he chose not to run at full capacity as he didn’t want to be seen having dinner with Williams.
Rocket Rodney showed that he’s only good on wheels by finishing the race behind Rolfe with a time of 22:27. Little to his knowledge, Bell had a bet with Rocket’s girlfriend Sarah Mooney, that the faster of the two men would take the missus and their newly purchased residence. Mooney later informed Bell that being a faster runner doesn’t make up for being faster in the sack and called off the bet. Unlucky for Bell, his attorney, Rocket Rodney, refused to represent him in the matter.
Smooth man Swade Arnold silked his way to the finish line in under 23 mins, a number his black book surpassed long ago. Missing for much of the 2009 footy season, it was assumed that Swade would be out of shape for the race, but a lot of snowboarding, hip-hop grooving and rooting obviously does the trick.
Nods Medley, renowned for falling asleep or going missing when things get a bit tough, must have stopped for a snooze during the event, finishing in over 24 mins. McCormack refused to comment regarding his medical advice, though insider reports have been leaked that he’s testing the same enlarging drug on his upper body in preparation for the 2010 season.
Dave “soon to be father” Kearney and Darcy “4-day bender” Skowronski rounded up the rear of the pack, pulling in honest performances. Both men admitting they prefer to stick to the behind and look for the tightest crack that they could jam their way through in order to get ahead of their opponents.
The season opening match between the two rival teams is set for May 15. Both team lists to be finalized later this week. Thank you to all though who came out to the pre-season run and we hope to see you all again next year.
Last Modified on 04/05/2010 03:07